Plastic-free Warrior Gifts

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

'Sorry sir,but we can't just take your word that the boots leak'

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

Tell me about it--last night I ate a whole sleeve of Communion wafers.

'The worst thing is not having access to your e-mail.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

"And that, gentlemen, is the Friday 4.55 pm Bad News Email Dump."

"I hit reply all too many times."

'I delete so much junk mail, my trash can icon turned into a dumpster.'

'There's a gentleman here who's concerned because you haven't responded to not one of his 12 million email spams.'

'That stuff kills 98% of household germs, but leaves the remaining 2% limping around enough to maintain your resistance.'

Ed Revere, Spam Courier

"Well that email could have been a meeting."

"...and you've got private use of it, so long as you don't exceed 10,000 mile per annum.'

Genius Bar

"Sea animals are long since extinct but he ocean is still dangerous for swimmers!"

"Unfortunately, our user-friendly toaster is warranty-unfriendly!"

Organic farm

"OK, let's see. For starters, the guarantee only covers the muffler."

"I only wish emails could deliver papercuts."

"She's in her happy place again."

The whale and the plastic bottle.

'No, now I'm just fighting inbox inequality."

'The good news is that I managed to install the wind turbine...'

Amateur Spam.

And this computer comes with a three year warranty, but of course it'll be obsolete in 6 months.

"Our planet no longer wants to receive email from yours."

"Look at it this way -- in three years your roof could leak."

"This the nastiest email that I ever read. I want to use it as our new template."

'Grandpa stop! That's not a jellyfish! It's a plastic bag!'

E-mail message - You have a message that isn't junk!

Shuffle Zone. Please shuffle and create static electricity to power our city.