Germ-free Warrior Gifts

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

'Garfield has told the oil companies to go to hell.'

The Jolly Green Giant Squid

'I must be reaching that age! I can't get my ozone layer up anymore!'

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

'Sorry sir,but we can't just take your word that the boots leak'

'Kiddie school is teaching about sharing; and someone shared their cold with Jennie,'

Hand sanitizer

The household cavalry

Another reason farm raised fish aren't as healthy as wild ones.

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

Asteroid Denying Dinosaur vs. Asteroid Believing Dinosaur.

The West Stealing the Resources of the East.

"I dunno...ask him."

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

Keystone XL

'Mom, why do I have to wash both hands? I only eat with one of them.'

'That stuff kills 98% of household germs, but leaves the remaining 2% limping around enough to maintain your resistance.'

'I'm building an ark because the polar ice caps are melting.'

"I started as a mundane disease ... but now I'm a super bacteria!"

'What did you do in the great whale war, grandad....'

"Did you wash your hands?"

"His commute to work's been getting shorter."

OH NO - Here come the wet-wipes..!!!

"It's not easy being green…"

The Seahoover

"I could probably keep spring-cleaning till next winter."

"...and you've got private use of it, so long as you don't exceed 10,000 mile per annum.'

Clean air.

"It's almost flu season! Stay indoors! Touch no one!"

"Mind if we go through the Park? There's this ailing ginkgo tree I want to check on."

"I wish these Humans would take their rubbish home with them..!!"