Portion Control Wizard T-Shirts

'We cut it into teensy-weensy squares.'

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

'What I like best about a magnum of Champagne is, it's a controlled portion.'

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

"You know why they make these straws so big? It's a scam to make you drink fast so you can finish quicker and order more."

All-Day Breakfast

Looking at belt - "One more notch, room for desert."

Weight Loss Counselor, out for a 400 calorie lunch.

"They should have quit after deep dish."

"I'm here to warn you, do not eat both slices of cake – you're going to want one tomorrow."

"I avoid the 3 'Bs' when I'm dieting - boxes, buckets and bags."

"We've gone 'Glutton-Free'."

"I'm on a diet. Mini-size it!"

Yes, I Want Fries With That.

"My father always said...eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince...and dinner like a beggar."

'...And when it registers over 140 pounds, it automatically triggers the refrigerator lock.'

I find that I can cut back on calories if I use only one chopstick.

"I'm Roberto, and I'll be your waiter this evening. This is Carl. He's in charge of portion control."

Go large or go home!

'I'll pay double for half as much.'

"You asked me to keep a food diary, this is last week's!"

"I'm glad you enjoyed your meal, Sir. Did you save some room for shame?"

"Who had the Lumberjack fruit cup?"

"Just one menu for us, please. We don't want to overeat."

"I don't know why I put weight on, I hardly eat enough to keep a sparrow alive."

"Just a heads-up... when you count calories, high score doesn't win."ories/high score

Portion control in the Old West

"It is way too much food. That's why we charge way too much money."

Diet Food...& lots of it

"It's only 5 calories a serving...but a serving is a crumb."

'You are what you eat!'

Portions of a thin and fat man.

'What do you mean, microbiotic?' 'Very small portions.'