Porridge Pundit Gifts

"Remember that little girl Goldilocks that hassled us about the porridge? She's now a big food critic on the internet!"

"I'm as progressive as they come, except for my money. No one touches my money."

'Wow, are all these desserts for here, or are you going to stuff your faces in the privacy of your own home?'

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

'I respond to stimuli, therefore I ham.'

CIA. Office of Disinformation. Please Use Other Door.

"Summer's here. Do you want to start talking incessantly about tomatoes or corn?"

"Prospectus in not spelt P...R...O...A...G...A...N...D...A."

"Every good scene in that move was in the coming attractions...why did we even bother to come watch it?"

'I've fallen in love and i've fallen in porage and believe me: porage is better.'

Apples...37 Spinach...43 Peaches...51

Dateline - Caf

Voice of the GOP

Reading Goldilocks - 'I know you don't like porridge, but bears eat anything.'

'My first drink since my accident.'

'You drink like a fish.'

"Thanks for the starter!"

Stay at Home Yellowstone.

'Ok cup cake looks like its time to meet your maker.'

"I swear, Eddie, you ought to be on with Bill Moyers."

'With the threat of ABS's competing for Council work is going to get even harder...'

'Happy hour was over an hour ago. Wipe that stupid grin off your face!'

'Actually, I'm not out foraging, I'm out porridging.'

"I know I should Fuggedaboutit but I can't."

"The truth? With all the fake news and alternative facts now, we're all just guessing."

"We're looking for a hacker to break into our competitors computers and get their recipes."

'I wish you'd learn to put the lid on your petri dish, Harry! We came hear with four kids, and now it looks like we've got 20 million!'

"Actually son....these are peaches!"

7 Dead Twits Pub & Alehouse - 'He's paying.'

Queue at Heaven's Gate for 'External Rewards'.

"I'm thinking of buying a peerage with the money from my second job."

"-and for those of you who don't know how to make porridge.."

'How come we never have porridge?'

"The PM plans to ennobble him."

Pound sign about to be crushed by a 1 Ton Trade weight