Poop Procrastinator Gifts

Colin would go to any lengths to avoid cleaning up after his dog.

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

Brad discovers what can happen when you don't wash your gym clothes...

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

Serious Putty

"This next song's from the soundtrack to the film of the book I never got around to writing."

Housewife: Out of Order.

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

"You forgot to pick up the dry cleaning. It's written all over your face."

"We really have to catch up on our New Yorkers."

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Al, The Go-From Guy

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

Invaders from Planet Manava.

'Hey, boss, what's a 7 letter work starting with 'w' that represents what I should be doing rather than solving crossword puzzles?'

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

"The pastor can't be disturbed. He's preparing for Sunday's service."

'Do excuse Ed's immobility - he's being regulated.'

Holiday Shopping for Guys

"How about fashionably never?"

I was a day late and a dollar short, but it was a personal best!

"Man! I just had to pull another all-dayer."

Messing around on the internet when your boss thinks you're hard at work.

"I find a good way to avoid stress is to close the curtains, climb into bed, and pull the covers over my head."

Why are you texting instead of working?

"Frankly, I could move a lot faster, but the truth is that I lack motivation..."

"He should be there by now. He left for work an hour ago."

Tred carefully mill.

Man reading magazine: 'International Procrastinator.'

'I asked you to clean the fridge, not declutter it.'

'I want to speak with you about your work habits.' 'You mean work is habit forming?'

Smug Colleagues Leaving Work.