Putting Procrastinator Gifts

The quintessential lazy office golfer

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"I did my report on time travel, but my dog ate my homework in the future."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"I'd rather eat your homework."

"Sorry, my report is blank. I just stayed home, watched tv and played video games during vacation."

Serious Putty

"Josh, can you call my 3:30 and let them know I'll be a little late and completely unfocused."

'1001 things to do whilst waiting to get on the internet.'

"This next song's from the soundtrack to the film of the book I never got around to writing."

'I forgot to do my homework so can we plow into a snow bank on the way to school?'

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

Studying and technology

"Have you ever had one of those days when it would have been easier just to do some work?"

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Al, The Go-From Guy

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. That's a relief! How much can they expect out of your on your first day?

'Hey, boss, what's a 7 letter work starting with 'w' that represents what I should be doing rather than solving crossword puzzles?'

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

Invaders from Planet Manava.

Is your homework finished? It's almost a snow day. No way

As the horrible signs began to appear, students would go to any length to avoid seeing them.

'You didn't practice last night,did you?'

"Oh no, I never replied to Theresa's email! And tomorrow I must call Steve.... What does Yara think of me?"

'Do excuse Ed's immobility - he's being regulated.'

Holiday Shopping for Guys

"The pastor can't be disturbed. He's preparing for Sunday's service."

Rip van Winkle goes back to the office/