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Hoax Squad

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

"There is no 'virtual arrest button', you'll have to get off your butt and do it manually."

'Have a heart, officer... the little mite is starving!'

"Wear a wire? Oh, no, all of our police informants have gone wireless."

'Oh no a speed camera.'

'I can't shake off this feeling we're being watched.'

"You were going 24,998 in a 24,955!"

"You're under arrest for breaking the law of gravity! You have the right to..."

Bank Robbery Statistics

'What ever happened to that persnickety inspector?'

"You have the right to remain silent."

'Can I have your autograph...?'

'I'm in the not-so-serious crime squad, actually'

Relax, I'm just here to pick up a prescription.

"Police dramas just aren't what they used to be."

'Why can't I park it here? I'm just getting my moneys worth.'

"C'mon man, you got the wrong species."

'Did you drop this £20 note, Sir?' 'Ooh, YES!' 'That will be a £50 fine.'

Arcarde Patrol

"I hate when this happens."

"Tell me about your fear of policemen."

Police hiding in the ballot box.

It's amazing how people slow down when you point a hair dryer at them.

'Pretty much every case up here is a cold case.'

'Before we go in, try to forget everything you thought you knew about criminal masterminds!'

"Hey, let's mix it up a bit today and have you be the bad cop."

"Next time you rob a bank, don't stick around to take a bunch of selfies with the money."

Boot shiner puts a smiley on a policemen's boot.

Might Versus Right.

Street trader tricking police.

"Gentlemen, our troubles are over, this is Tony 'The Torch' Barbella"

Police officer giving ticket to paramedics.

Some mistakenly think 'HOV Lane' means Hot Occupant Vehicles.

'I think you have the wrong idea,sonny!'