Polar Paddler Gifts

Canoe paddle with a bite mark in it.

Bitchbark Canoe

"The Ice Age must've caught him by surprise..."

'We might make more progress if we try working as a team.'

"It's Zeus' latest obsession."

"These things are delicious. Hard and crunchy on the outside, soft and chewy on the inside!"

A Different Way To Portage A Canoe.

canoeist on the edge of a waterfall, stopping himself falling with his oar.

"Wow-free sky hoagies!"

"Caught another one!" "Let's eat!"

'I think it's time we came to grips with our addiction to buying kayaks.'

Canadian Canoe.

Hey, come and check this out: I've stumbled upon Superman's Fortress of Solitude...

"Dunno...they all look the same to me..."

'...and cut the croc stories, I know you're just trying to make this dull trip exciting.'

'Honey, you can't keep running to Daddy every time you find a little bug or something in your pool!'

"Norman's really into wild paddling."

'Mush, mush, mush.'

'I hear the Met office is predicting further Arctic weather conditions.'

"I'm sorry but we don't have a room with a view."

Canoeing Incorrectly

"I am just going outside to find an NHS dentist and may be some time."

Man cold-calling on phone from igloo

'These casual Fridays are killing me.'

'Howie, I know we're still on break, but I don't think we wanna miss this one.'

'So... is the sea rising or is the ice melting?'

'This wasn't in the adventure brochure!'

Solo North pole expedition - 'Bugger!'

'Yes, I do own a dog...why do you ask?'

Global warming.

'What do you mean your paddling trip went so well you lost track of time? You were supposed to be home over a year ago!'

'Cut that out! Every time you jump in our pool, we have to refill it!'

Summer Sketches - Interesting and refreshing reading

"If it gets boring, I can tell you how I borrowed money from the Mob, and how, right now, we;re actually on the run from them."

"It's called investing! You give me your worm now, I eat half of it, feed the other half to the fish and, in a month, we share the fish 10/90 my way. . ."