Pointillism Ponderer Gifts

"You have a nasty case of 'A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte' by Georges Seurat."

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Chiller Theatre

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Sauce for the Goose

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

I don't think I'm letting sunlight in when I open the curtains. I think the darkness is going out.

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

"I cross the road to forget."

"Is this who I am?"

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

Afraid of change - leave it here.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

'...and that is my philosophy.'

'Why am I the one always getting kicked?'

Non Thought For The Day.

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"Now, my brave little soldier, do you have everything...an apple for your teacher, your satchel, pencils and books - your existential misery??"