Playful Schemer Gifts

"If I do that to my own Barbie, imagine what might happen to a tattle-tale."

'I put a dab of Pine-Sol behind each ear and my husband thinks I've been cleaning all day.'

Old man stealing sand from a sand box for child

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

"One day, my boy, all this will be retirement homes."

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

'She'll never look for me here.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

"Well, I finally figured out why we were going to the vet so often for check ups! He finally plucked up the courage to ask her out!"

"An Iraq attack is one thing, but I'm not sure about a Persian incursion."

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

'I am constantly diversifying my toy portfolio.'

'Here's the game plan going forward. We acknowledge any and all 'mistakes,' then fake fixing them.'

"Do you call this a business plan?"

"I've made myself a success through a combination of long-term planning and short term tantrums."

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

'Things look much better long-term, once we pass the statute of limitations.'

And here is where we stooped to the level of the competition.

"I'm in big trouble. The dog ate my homework, and Dad ate my science project."

'Do you want to be red Tory or blue Labour?'

'If you know what's good for you Allan, you'll let me pass.'

"It's a setup."

'let's see if we can find any loopholes in this 'honesty-is-the-best-policy' nonsense.'

CX909708

BUSINESS PRESCHOOL

"It's a game where we roll the dice to see which destination wedding we should spend our savings on this year."

"This'll look great on my transcript!"

"Sign the contract first kid, then you get the sweets!"

"We're fighting them in zone A, they're our allies in zone B, and we don't know what to do in zone C."

"Just take the free kick, and stop wasting time."

Valentine Comix

'Oh, that's Dan, the congressman's right AND left hand man'

'While Dewey distracts the defense, the quarterback simply jogs into the end zone untouched.'