Playful Dramatist Gifts

'Hard to follow...'

A man taking a bow

"Bruh, that is some SERIOUS kazoo."

'It's okay, there's a trampoline under the snow.'

Shakespeare's Lost Play: The Taming of the Pooch.

'Out, damned Spot.'

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

'It's a zen diaphragm.'

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

"In closing, I would like to remind the jury that he says he didn't do it."

'After you grade my report, may I have my intellectual property back?'

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

'We'll send you to acting class when you're older. For now, get up and get ready for school.'

Daughters at Bedtime

"Bill just does celebrity cook-books these days, that's where the real money is."

Intellectual Foreplay...

'I play an evolving character, In the second act, I'm a piece of pie,'

"Twenty five years! But your honor,

Sailor boy

"Once again, I simply don't recall."

"More helium."

'In this next precedent, an attorney lost his frivolous lawsuit complaint and his opponent then filed a frivolous 'frivolous lawsuit' lawsuit.'

"Impartiality becomes you."

A Lawyer's Closing Arguments Wins the Support of the Jury

An opera singer

"We can't put you in a Witness-Protection Program unless you actually witnessed something."

'Never mind four out of five doctors.. what do four out of five LAWYERS recommend?'

'What's this? You're suing me because the prescribed medication made you 'irrationally exuberant' in a down market?'

Closing arguments.

'I'm afraid that driving the getaway car is more than just a driving offence, Mr. Jones.'

'Now, then -- would you prefer a speedy trial or an accurate trial.'

Pogo Cellist

"And were you wearing that particular hat on the night of the murder?"

'Let's get some play-doh and make happy masks.'