Pigskin Pal Gifts

'...After a few hours he'll get hungry and bored and simply let go.'

Two old superheroes on a park bench feeding the birds.

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

"Football is too dangerous, Junior. Why not follow my footsteps in a safe sport - chasing investment yield?"

Football.

Hold on Cutlet! We have to get past Mom's waxed floor!

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

Feathered frenzy

Stories about crumbs

"By the way… If no one has mentioned this before, we think you're swell."

Cultivating Toughness in Footballs.

The Butcher of 35th street.

'As you can see - it doesn't pay to badmouth the quarterback.'

'My turn! Kick me next!!'

Stop the big guy!

"He's a phony - made of all those new fat substitutes."

'Uh-oh ... Manning got hit hard, and he's not getting up.'

"I'll throw around the 'old pigskin' as long as the pig isn't still in it."

'Don't ask me what play to call..I've only got a one year contract...you've got a four year scholarship...you decide what play to call.'

"O.K., let's see what all the fuss is about."

"We're both homing pigeons, so to come for a playdate at my house, forget your instinct and just follow me..."

'Your grandfather is a cautionary tale, son. He quit school early and pinned all his hopes on an NFL career. But in the end, he was never used in a single game.'

"Wood-oven-toasted rosemary focaccia or traditional baguette?"

Midnight in Minnesota

'Why don't you try to think outside of the trough once in a while?'

'They say it's a bad sign when the pigeons are coughing.'

...thirty-nine years young, recent divorcee, lifestyle includes a canine leitmotif....

'Mum, this is my new best friend, Bill: We both love rolling in the mud...'

When a pig blocks a sneeze.