Piggy Giggler Gifts

''Bad pig!' 'Is that even possible?''

The Busy Gardener

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

"Garden variety allergies."

Hardy Annuals

"Hello Mr Flower. You've got a pretty face. But your feet are filthy."

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

Beginning Yarder.

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

Yard Sale

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

'It was this big. I swear'

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

"What are you in for?"

Garden of Eden and scrumping

'...and this is the water garden...'

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

'I can't hire you, but I can sell you some stock in the company.'

2pm meet your Creator

Moses' first encounter with the burning bush didn't go well.

'God sees everything? You mean He channel surfs?'

'Where are you going?'

'I wish to refer you to a tree surgeon. You have all the symptoms of Dutch Elm disease!'

I'm going for former flower children. Tree's Tree Nursery. Legal pot. Legal grass. Festuca. Carex. Miscanthus.

"I'd like me first word to be profound, but I'll probably panic and blurt out 'Mama' like every other baby."

Balding gnomes

Old men,"I have terrible trouble with my joints..the cannabis keeps falling out."