Phone System Master Pillows

"You had the persistence to figure out our complex phone system just to get an interview. You're hired!"

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

Kid is 'Born to Text'.

Do you have a phone with recording capabilities? I want to be able to carry a wire when I meet with my boss.

National Coffee Day

"I''' have the misspelled 'Ceasar' salad and the improperly hyphenated veal osso-buco."

"How 'local' is the fish?"

'Would you like that organic, locally grown, carbon neutral, fair trade, trans fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free and peanut-free?'

'A willingness to sacrifice yourself to bring 'peace and succor to the suffering' is all very well Mother Theresa but I don't think it makes up for your lack of knowledge of current hand sanitisation protocols.'

"I'm trying to decide between water and sunlight."

'I'll have the 'All of the above.''

"FISH ON"

'Do you have eczema?' 'No, only what's on the menu.'

"You folks ready to order?"

"Everything on the menu can be prepared with no gluten, standard gluten, or extra gluten."

'Compliment me on my perfect pronunciation of this junk,and there'll be a good tip in it for you.'

"Don't order anything that will embarass me."

Our specials today include salad and dessert. Tip and service are NOT included.

Printing Room

'Bird menu.'

Girls night!

'If you now feel like punching someone in the face. . . press five!'

Call before you dig!

You are on hold. Press One for Vivaldi...

Aliens man telephone store named ET&T Phones.

'SPRING water-in the middle of summer???'

"Line one is on line two..."

"Ah - Sir has fancied something from the menu."

"I have a food question."

"I really shouldn't have any dessert. My trainer told me never to eat out of boredom."

'These are some great solutions we've come up with, Ed. See if we have any problems they'll solve.'

'I'm lactose intolerant, gluten intolerant, vegan and allergic to tomatoes...what have you got that's good?'

"Well, Doc, being in the business. My opinion is that your printer got too much ink on his plates."