Protocol Master Pillows

'A willingness to sacrifice yourself to bring 'peace and succor to the suffering' is all very well Mother Theresa but I don't think it makes up for your lack of knowledge of current hand sanitisation protocols.'

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

Canned laughter for sale in Theatrical Supplies shop.

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'It's only fair to warn you that if you get the job there would be a lot of filing involved.'

'Their daughter plays the violin.'

'I'm afraid I can't take you to my leader without a prior appointment.'

During his financial report to the board of directors, Ted hits the poignancy button by mistake.

'Tommy's book reports are like no other.'

Stupid ideas rewritten to sound like brilliant concepts.

"And this all happened in the last week..."

"One day she'll be a wonderful architect."

"It's Cinderella?!?"

"You had the persistence to figure out our complex phone system just to get an interview. You're hired!"

'Miss Wilson, get on the web and find me everything on bottles!'

Welcome to Silicon Valley...the user friendly place.

'Well done! I've never heard anyone slip from jargon into gibberish and out again with such ease!'

'My son is studying communications in college. He never writes, calls, texts, or emails his parents.'

'Why am I feeling like this..?'

'We're to spend more time engaging with patients on a more compassionate 'human' level...and here are the guidelines on how to do it!'

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

"THIS looks like a job for ... somebody else."

'You can't come into the clean room looking like that.'

Computer shows code violation to wierd user.

The shining light of open-source software.

'If you have anything of importance to tell me, for goodness sake, begin at the end.'

"Darling, I realised that you didn't like your dinner by the third sheet."

"Oh, no, Peter has legoed himself into his room!"

"If you want something done give it to a busy man."

Tape-to-go: Suppliers of red tape

Mister Pickle

Being a stickler for rules, Howard refuses to act until his motion has been seconded.

'Our next speaker won't bore you with a long speech. He can do it with a short one...'

'Not everyone is comfortable with slashing planning bureaucracy.'

Last chance for public relations next exit...next PR- 87 miles