Phone Flirt Pillows

"Totally naked except for my socks. How 'bout yourself?"

"Talk nerdy to me."

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

Romance

"When you say that love is in the air, you're referring to the smells from the food trucks, right?"

Why we need poetry. . .

An historic event in Candyland: When M met M

I only have eyes for you

"Call me?"

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

"Wow, I just love the way you waddle!"

You are my sunshine!

'I met my wife in unfortunate circumstances. I was single.'

"I don't understand it! My nerd detector's going crazy!"

'Tomorrow we'll look back on this as a night to remember.'

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

'Did you just hear that? We are now and endangered species and mating is now our top priority!'

"I wanna be your lapdog."

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

"Recess does things to a man."

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

"Shiver-me-timbers, wench! How many times have I got to tell you? I'm not winking at you!"

Barman In Love.

'Let's go to your place. I cook, I clean and then we can have a meaningful shag.'

'I think I've scored.'

"Well, what are you doing after the millennium?"

'This must be heaven, because you sure look like an angel....'

'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'

"I'm texting you a love poem inspired by the emoji you sent me."

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

"Eres la chica mas linda del mundo."

'Half o' mild and a bag of pork scratchings - you're grooming me, aren't you?'

"You're the woman of one of my dreams."