Phone Call Dramatist Pillows

"Her ladyship isn't in—wait, yes, no—so sorry, she's out."

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

A man taking a bow

"Yes, I'm alone."

"In closing, I would like to remind the jury that he says he didn't do it."

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

"Less hair doesn't mean less work!"

"Twenty five years! But your honor,

"Impartiality becomes you."

'In this next precedent, an attorney lost his frivolous lawsuit complaint and his opponent then filed a frivolous 'frivolous lawsuit' lawsuit.'

"Once again, I simply don't recall."

A Lawyer's Closing Arguments Wins the Support of the Jury

"Eric, this is your father, mister Trump." "You must have the wrong number. I'm Mortimer Park."

Cold caller.

'Never mind four out of five doctors.. what do four out of five LAWYERS recommend?'

'What's this? You're suing me because the prescribed medication made you 'irrationally exuberant' in a down market?'

"We can't put you in a Witness-Protection Program unless you actually witnessed something."

"I'll have to call you back. The cat looks really pleased with himself, and I gotta find out why."

Closing arguments.

'I'm afraid that driving the getaway car is more than just a driving offence, Mr. Jones.'

'Now, then -- would you prefer a speedy trial or an accurate trial.'

"Yes, Your Honor, I'm Mr. Brandon, Mr. Shindelbower's attorney, along with his agent and publicist."

"If you're annoyed by answering machines, press 1. . ."

What do overcrowded prisons say about defense lawyers?

"I would like to conduct my own defence, m'lud."

"And were you wearing that particular hat on the night of the murder?"

'I'm still in conference, Miss Alsted.'

"You're an attorney. Don't stand so upright."

"Did someone just shout 'sinkhole!!!'?"

Incontinence Hot Line - 'Please hold.'

'I called this emergency meeting to discuss the lack of respect I've been getting around here lately.'

'Your honor, my client feels you should recuse yourself as he is a cat person.'