Pet Visionary Gifts

"I don’t want to ‘fetch’ – I want to practice entertainment law."

"States of tofu"

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

Cat Reunion

"Yes, one is a dog."

"The library rejected your request to ban all books on cats and squirrels. But, to be fair, it was no dumber than all the other book ban requests we get."

'What's amazing is that I only threw one stick.'

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

Thatched roof car.

"He's my school project for science class."

"Let's see now: All dogs have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a dog."

"Dogs are men."

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

"It's just a jogger!" "It's just a car!" "There's nothing out there now!" "I was thinking of the squirrel I saw last week"

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

'These virtual-reality goggles are great! Right now, I'm sun-bathing in Tahiti...'

'He wasn't doing a bit good, until I changed his glasses.'

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

"MOUSE FLAVORED CAT FOOD"

'Let's get a kitty.'

"I'm telling you! They don't know anything! No one is in charge!"

"When I get to heaven do you think I'll get my testicles back?"

Cat in tank sees fish form letters to spell out, 'Help'.

They say animals have the sixth sense and the talent to look into the future...

The Inner Dog.

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

"I told the cook I would prefer that she use some kind of artificial blackbird substitute."

"It turns out our health plan does cover eyeglasses."

Artists At The Auto Show

"Great - Now what would be the second thing you'd do if you had opposable thumbs?"

Cat on a psychiatrist's couch: 'Truth is, I'm not really a cat person.'

'This is Citroen Picasso's cubist period.'

'And since this product consists of 100% artificial ingredients, we can truthfully say it's vegan!'

'Having trouble getting used to your new bi-focals'

"Thanks to my new glasses, I can enjoy a good old "bird's eye view" again..."