Pet Pun Collector Pillows

101 uses of a dead cat: headphones.

'His bark's worse than that.'

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

'I call it a flat.'

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

'It's a snow mobile.'

'And in addition it seems that he has been eating some of the other children'.

The Bear Fax.

"The guy I bought him from says he's a pure sheepdog."

Bell Hop

Toast kidnapper.

'He's not big enough to use the toilet yet.'

Prawn Shop

"Was she a roaming Catholic?"

Air Transylvania's Red Eye Flight.

Custer's Last Rollo

Spiv

Dogs Home: Beware of the Human

"I must be getting old . . . I crossed over here, but now I can't remember why!"

Jerry had a difficult time coming up with cartoon ideas over the noise his dogs made. '...so then the cat says, 'No, thanks. I'll clean it myself.' 'Ha,ha! Yeah, that's a good one,Phil!'

"They just love tassels."

"Keep it in the sling and rub hot sauce on our wing every 4 hours."

'That's not funny, Fred.'

"Why have you come over here?"

"Cat nip"

"I'm afraid you have only three minutes to live."

'Sir, how long did it take you to learn to drive?'

'Sure, we could fetch things for them, but why raise their expectations.'

A day in the life of a serial mis-pronouncer.

"Sheesh Kebab"

Shorn sheep gets Baaaaard!

Party Animal, Party Vegetable, Party Mineral

Man with big furry mustache drives car with grill that looks like same.