Pet Owner With Mixed Feelings Gifts

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

Cat in Tree.

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

"His mother was a poodle and his father was a shoe."

"DID YOU SEND THIS?"

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

"It's a bit of a surprise. He has eaten people before, but only when he felt threatened. Your husband must have provoked him."

'No, that isn't my slippers either! Try again.'

'This won't take long, nurse. This is the dog that got my best friend last summer.'

Zack Brillard and Live-In Companion

It' complications galore for Sparky when easy-to-assemble instructions are read upside down.

'I'm not an indoor cat. I'm a bitter, angry, frustrated, resentful, repressed cat.'

'I've been fixed even though there wasn't anything wrong with me.'

"Actually, I would rather have a dog. It's just that we need the eggs."

"My dog is a finicky eater. He refuses to eat my homework."

"He was a sea rescue."

"Who wants to go for walkies?"

Boy throws a stick for a tortoise. By the time the tortoise returns, the boy is an old man.

'Heel! HEEL! Bad potato!'

101 uses of a dead cat: chariot wheels.

"It isn't quite how I pictured it, either."

Timmys Pet Ostrich

'What! No garnish or side salad?'

Cat pleads into mouse hole: 'Can't we talk about this?'

'That's the worst case of fleas I've ever seen...!'

Do not allow your owner to foul the footpath.

"He won't wait for me to open the can."

If you want full cover for your cat I suggest you take out the nine lives policy.

"You're right, you DO smell like a wiener!"

The Curse of the Werewolf

Handicapped Accessible Hydrant

'I told you it was a stupid idea getting a pet lemming.'