Pet Nutrition Guru Gifts

Mature Cat Formula.

'It's important to watch the amount of iron in his diet, too much and he'll only point north.'

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"How long is it since you took Benji for a walk?"

"Odd, since neither of us overfeeds her by even the smallest amount."

'One final question.. what's your policy on table scraps?'

'My owner is feeding me way too much organic food.'

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

"Alright, alright! I'll stop buying the cheap stuff, OK?"

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

'You put him on a diet, so he put you on a diet.'

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

'School of nutrition - as of today: Butter, good...'

"It's mouseborn."

Free range cat food - mice running around the store.

Bear eating Nutri-Honey.

Overloaded on Junk Food.

'You're lucky you can't read.'

'I don't think that brand of cat food is very healthy.'

"It's the first edition of 'How dogs know what their owners are bringing home for dinner'."

'I don't care if top breeders do recommend it - I am not going to eat dog food!'

'I'm putting Babs on a diet. She's more paunch than pooch.'

"This is our new product consultant."

"You might consider eliminating some of the roadkill from your diet."

Chiropractor and Veterinarian.

Many schools are going away with the traditional junk food vending machines.

'Cut back on red meat!'

"Lemme guess. Kibble."

Halloween on Other Planets.

'Normally, he's an indoor dog, but he got into the bean dip.'

"I've got a complaint about the table scraps you are feeding me...cut down on the fatty tissues...I'm gaining weight!"

Dog Food Testing Lab.

English men to have 42 inch waists by 2032. 'This machine is unsuitable for males born after 2021...'

'I hope you're not selling something. Rex doesn't like salespeople.'

"I've taken you off fats, cholesterol, alcohol, sugar, meat and grain. I'm afraid there's nothing left to put you on."