Pet-loving Friend Gifts

"If it's just the one after dinner I don't mind."

"Something is definitely going on. We're back to eating dog food."

Pets on holiday.

'The good news is that you don't have apnea. The bad news is that Fluffy sleeps on your face.'

Things to whine about: 'I'm making a list of my pet peeves.'

'I already have a home security system.'

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'For goodness sake, what do you expect me to say?'

State of the Art Dog.

Man wearing a dog cone

Puffy's Safe Travel Inspection Station

'Relax!... It's you!'

"Shh. He doesn't know he's adopted yet."

Separation

'STANDARD AMERICAN MOONDOGGIE'

'I'm telling you the truth! Toilet water is no better than water straight from the tap.'

'Enough of my tapeworm - tell me about your fleas.'

'He has an invisible fence so he has to wear a flee collar.'

'Morning paper?' - 'No thanks, I like to fetch it myself.'

'You've no need to worry wile we're out - he wont let anyone come near the place.'

'My hamster fell asleep at the wheel!'

'Good news, Darling, they can clone cats.'

Sound Advice

A dog is for life, not just for Covid.

"I'll share the house with you assuming you prefer to be outdoors."

Dog Day Afternoon

"It's alive! It's nearly impossible to tell the difference, but it's alive!"

Moulting Dog

"Youff!"

A bird looks into a birdhouse from which the legs and tail of a cat are dangling.

"And whose little mole is this?"

“Putty took a wife. Her name was Possums, and she bore him Little Gentleman, Biddy Boo, Savor Tooth, Fluffy, Harry Cat, and Cesar. Then Little Gentleman begat Little Gentleman II and Friday and Tinkle Toes and Possum Tail and…”

"That one there is Marvin's personal pussycat."

"Lately, the demands of our cat have begun to spiral wildly out of control."

"I'm expected for dinner around seven. Other than that I'm completely free."