Pet-loving Friend Pillows

"If it's just the one after dinner I don't mind."

"Something is definitely going on. We're back to eating dog food."

Pets on holiday.

'The good news is that you don't have apnea. The bad news is that Fluffy sleeps on your face.'

Things to whine about: 'I'm making a list of my pet peeves.'

'I already have a home security system.'

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'For goodness sake, what do you expect me to say?'

'Relax!... It's you!'

State of the Art Dog.

Man wearing a dog cone

Puffy's Safe Travel Inspection Station

'Morning paper?' - 'No thanks, I like to fetch it myself.'

Separation

Sound Advice

A dog is for life, not just for Covid.

'My hamster fell asleep at the wheel!'

"Shh. He doesn't know he's adopted yet."

'STANDARD AMERICAN MOONDOGGIE'

'He has an invisible fence so he has to wear a flee collar.'

'You've no need to worry wile we're out - he wont let anyone come near the place.'

'I'm telling you the truth! Toilet water is no better than water straight from the tap.'

"I'll share the house with you assuming you prefer to be outdoors."

'Enough of my tapeworm - tell me about your fleas.'

'Good news, Darling, they can clone cats.'

"Very Funny."

Sick Exhibitionist

"I love you both very much but I've got to find my real parents."

"The dog wants out again!"

"Aww, geez... what next?"

"I wasn't dead yet."

"I'm OK. But I think the dog wants to go out."

"I'm expected for dinner around seven. Other than that I'm completely free."

"I just don't get it, they don't do it themselves, so why do they insist on us sitting before crossing the road?"

"Youff!"