Pet-loving Friends Gifts

"I did it!"

'OK, Mr. Altruism, real fast, name three selling points of loyalty that don't involve food.'

'I've finally learned to delegate.'

"You're completely screwed up."

Yes, I am a Sphynx-Cat, and yes, I am called "Fluffy". My Master has a sick sense of humour...

Bad review

'Declawed, Denutted and Deranged.'

"Yep, that's water retention."

Bitchbark Canoe

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

Skeleton playing fetch.

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

Lifestyles of the hamsters of the rich and famous.

Raised by Dogs

Collies Without Borders

"He was a sea rescue."

"This is Blackjack, come in Yahtzee."

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

'Don't be embarrassed by your anti-barking collar, implanted tracking chip, and GPS device. Just think of them as fashion accessories.'

Christmas Pets

"She's a miniature."

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

PET THEORIES

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

"Humans are strange."

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

'Now, you're new here, but you should know the rules: I get Master's newspaper and slippers! Got that?'

"And for dessert, I'd like the mice pudding."

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'