Pet Fish Keepers Gifts

Flooding

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

"I think the ants are mooning me again."

"He's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes...like a DOLL'S EYES!!"

It is essential not to overcrowd a tank as this can cause serious problems...

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

"She's just being Koi."

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

"Where's all your fish?" "I never should have bought 'coy' fish."

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

Fish Tank Label - Corporation Fish

Leak in the fish tank.

Al, why is my goldfish zigzagging? Perhaps sharing my beer with him was a case of misplaced generosity on my part.

"I don't do windows."

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

"Well, this isn't really going anywhere if you don't like public displays of affection."

'I wish I was creative'

Fish-tank Skyscraper.

"Take your first left and then keep turning left until you eventually float to the top."

"Please, Al. You know the backstroke scares the children."

Overeaters anonymous meeting today at 5:00.

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

Another environmentally correct office product: The executive desk/organizer-fish ladder

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

"This aquarium is such a nice prison."

'All I said was 'belly up to the bar'.'

Al puts tiny diapers on his fish.

'Twitter for goldfish.'

'Too bad we're not pay-per-view.'

"Why... do goldfish have such a short memory span? We don't – there isn't anything to remember if all you do is swim around in circles all day long."

"We have to get out of here! They're saying boil ALL water!"

'Don't know much about art but I know what I like.'

'The 79 cent fish ate the $2.50 fish - shall I charge him $3.29 for it now?'