Fish Keepers Gifts

You're gonna have to learn to go with me watching you.

'The 79 cent fish ate the $2.50 fish - shall I charge him $3.29 for it now?'

'Here's why it's so cheap. It's dry clean only.'

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

"I think the ants are mooning me again."

Fish that snore, and the tragic lives of those who care.

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

It is essential not to overcrowd a tank as this can cause serious problems...

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

"He's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes...like a DOLL'S EYES!!"

"Where's all your fish?" "I never should have bought 'coy' fish."

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

"She's just being Koi."

Leak in the fish tank.

Fish Tank Label - Corporation Fish

"I don't do windows."

Al, why is my goldfish zigzagging? Perhaps sharing my beer with him was a case of misplaced generosity on my part.

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

Fish-tank Skyscraper.

"Take your first left and then keep turning left until you eventually float to the top."

"Guide to physical comedy fish"

'I wish I was creative'

"Please, Al. You know the backstroke scares the children."

Overeaters anonymous meeting today at 5:00.

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

'All I said was 'belly up to the bar'.'

'Too bad we're not pay-per-view.'

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

Al puts tiny diapers on his fish.

"This aquarium is such a nice prison."

'Twitter for goldfish.'

"Why... do goldfish have such a short memory span? We don't – there isn't anything to remember if all you do is swim around in circles all day long."

'Don't know much about art but I know what I like.'