Pet Dynamics Enthusiast Gifts

"In this family we have a constant power struggle!"

"Between being totally aloof or obsessively curious, it's a full day."

"He may be neutered and declawed, but he's still dangerous."

"Jerk." "Jackass." "Screw you." "Bite me."

A relevant sign for the shopkeeper's predicament.

'Right, you peck his left paw, I'll go for the right one.'

"Eddie, you are one hell of a mouse!"

Parrot annoying dog.

'The cat did it.'

"Is this your work?"

"See. I told you they have Roomba Rodeos when we're gone."

"My dog ate my parents' marijuana, and then ate my homework."

'Byt the way, what have you been eating? Because your crap tastes like crap!'

'Journey of self-discovery' Dog realizes he can make his leg move when he scratches.

"You know what I love? Rolling in dead squirrel." "Oh, my God, yes! How about peeing on the floor at Petco?!" "Wait, wait–what's the farthest distance either of you have rubbed your butt across a carpet?!"

Another Timmy Pet Fail!

'And you need some reading material,eh?'

'Oh look, John, it's Chirpie who's been firing darts at the cat - and all this time we thought it was the children.'

'You can speed it up if you want.'

'Crickets? I mean cricket?'

You're right! She's mad because we got her a small rodent for her birthday last year, too.

Dog: "Have you noticed? He looks more like me all the time."

"What?!"

"I have to call you back, Mom. I'm right in the middle of updating the dog's website."

Beware of Blog

'Uh-Oh! There goes the neighborhood.'

"She has these fantasies that she ‘rescued’ me, and I just let her believe it."

Fat Kid 33- Stops playing with the cat

Will be back at 4...

'Ohhhh, he finally broke.'

Alpha dog

'The Pied Piper routine has got to stop.'

"Big deal! You're still all bums to me."

"Meow?"

"We're out of the cat food. Permit me to recommend the dog food."