Pest Predicament Ponderer Gifts

'Enough of my tapeworm - tell me about your fleas.'

'Tell him we just want rid of the rabbits, we don't need a puppet show thank you very much.'

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

Bees v Wasps

'Ooops. Look at it this way: you won't have to worry about bee mites infesting your colonies now.'

"A plague of frogs? Awesome!"

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

The Human Condition

"This wasn’t a mouse, ma’am — it was a cartoonist."

Bumper Limos

Zika Epidemic

"May I say, sir, the staff and I just knew you'd see through that Beaujolais."

Desert crawler following water

"So, Michael, any pesticidal thoughts today?"

Look at all the pretty flowers....Neonicotinoids.

'it's either mass hysteria, or a very effective advertising campaign.'

"We have raccoons."

Selective pesticide - to kill only ugly insects (and not butterflies and ladybirds).

"Don't think of them as fleas. Think of them as your entourage!"

"Well, I admire your resilience."

The social isolation of the entomologist...

Well at least we can handle these rocks.

'Just knock over a couple of garbage cans, and bring us whatever you find.'

Mountains and Molehills

'If the opposite sex insisted on devouring YOUR head and laying thousands of eggs in YOUR carcass, then perhaps celibacy wouldn't seem like such an unreasonable lifestyle option!'

"My whole life, …. I've never wanted to be anything other than a psychiatric patient."

"Oh no. Not the niblets."

'Hello, is that Ace Exterminators?'

'That's the trouble with the older generation...they're too intolerant.'

'If they didn't want us around, how come they keep putting food out for us?"

Do you have a problem?. . . Continue on as usual.

Career choices for fleas.

'If moths like light so much why do you never see them during the day?'

'I'm from the exterminators, here to kill moths...Those devils, it's worse than I thought.'

'Yes, most humans call us pests or vermin, but a few of them love us as pets...'