Pest Control Humor Aficionados Gifts

Mouse on Stilts

"Houston, we have a problem."

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

'He's got abdominal pain, dizziness and soreness in his extremities. I'll know more when I see X-rays...'

"What do you mean blood sucking pest? You're the one who invited me into your life!"

There was a nasty bug going around.

"This stuff worked pretty well on me."

'Not that insect, silly! That's my husband.'

"Your honor, my client is a very respectable blood-sucking pest."

In his haste to wipe out the hornets' nest, Jerry mistakenly grabbed a can of spray paint,

'Oh, we aren't disturbing my husband. He's busy with mosquitos.'

Hey! Built-ins! Carpenter Ants: Best-Case Scenario.

'Yeah, I used to live with thousands of my friends in the kitchen of a restaurant, but for some reason, it was closed down...'

'Thanks, 'two fish heads and a saucer of milk' is the best estimate so far.'

Out to lunch (in kitchen).

'No, Ma'am, nothin' dead under there... just a nest of adolescent lawyers.'

"Remember kids: the best way to annoy a human is to fly around its nose, ears, mouth or eyes..."

Pest control.

Clancy: Thick Flies

Tragedy strikes the Black Arrows display team!

The seven year itch. 'Relax, it's only fleas.'

Acme Pest Control

'This tongue transplant I had with fly paper is great.'

Old fly...retirement home.

A Better Mouth-Tap

'I won the hide and seek game: I was hiding really still in a plate full of rice...'

Pink Snail

Farmer's Market

'Oh, great...a human. You know if you see one, there are hundreds more you don't see.'

"I've told you, the bottom of the toaster is always full of bread crumbs..."

"It's delicious. I think it's rat poison."

"Stop, Frank! That's not deodorant!"

"I hope we live happily in every rafter."

'Well, this would explain all those droppings we've been finding.'

"Ye, just like I thought. Mennonites."