Pessimism Philosopher Gifts

"You say half full, I say half empty."

'In an unexpected move today, the Optimists' Club gave up.'

Marriage guidance - "She can't help us. As a couple we are the perfect match!"

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

Arthur Schopenhauer

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Pessimists v Optimists.

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

"A pessimist thinks that we've already arrived."

"Half Empty. Half Empty. Half Empty-"

'There, Mr Optimist. Now how full is it?'

"Look on the dark side."

'I make certain all my clients are pessimists...they don't expect to win.'

Tom's last day.

"If, indeed, there is a reason for all this, than that's so much worse."

Doom & Gloom

"Everything in your life has gone smoothly. That's a violation of Murphy's law."

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

The End is Near art gallery opening.

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

"Maybe you should be depressed, your life isn't that great."

"Die alone"

'Some see the glass as half empty, some see it as half full -- I see it as taxable!'

"A glimmer of hope is fine, Hendricks, but anything more than that will lead to massive disappointment."

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

'Barnhill from Marketing will present our economic projections.'

'I feel better today too, but around here I've learned not to be too optimistic.'

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

'Would you say this glass is half empty or half full?'

"What? You were expecting good news? Expectations are so-o-o-o passe."