Pessimism Enthusiast Gifts

Desk Bins of a Curmudgeon.

"Waiter! My glass is half empty."

"If at first you don't succeed blame somebody."

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

"It's 2020, children. Just have faith that nothing's gonna work out in the end!"

"Is this worse? Or is this worse?"

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"Sometimes, on days like this, I feel like the world is conspiring to make me happy."

'My pessimism keeps me optimistic.'

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Pessimists v Optimists.

'There, Mr Optimist. Now how full is it?'

Tom's last day.

'I make certain all my clients are pessimists...they don't expect to win.'

"If, indeed, there is a reason for all this, than that's so much worse."

Doom & Gloom

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

The End is Near art gallery opening.

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

"Die alone"

"Maybe you should be depressed, your life isn't that great."

'Barnhill from Marketing will present our economic projections.'

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

'Some see the glass as half empty, some see it as half full -- I see it as taxable!'

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

'Would you say this glass is half empty or half full?'

Gonna Suck

'Taking guard' 'The pessimist'

Y2K Solutions Inc.

'Turned out nice again.'

The guy who wanted change, experience, a shoulder to cry on, and a medal, all tied up in a nice,neat package, with whipped cream and a cherry on top.

This will be a banner day for you!

'You know, that Lenny is a real 'glass half empty' kind of guy...!'

'I'm afraid things have to get worse before they can get even worse.'

Things are never as bad as they seem - they're usually much, much worse.