Pessimist Aficionado Gifts

'So, how long have you been managing the Department of What Could Possible Go Wrong?'

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

'My pessimism keeps me optimistic.'

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

Tom's last day.

The End is Near art gallery opening.

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

"Die alone"

"Oh well - same shit, different day. . .!"

'Barnhill from Marketing will present our economic projections.'

"A glimmer of hope is fine, Hendricks, but anything more than that will lead to massive disappointment."

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

"What? You were expecting good news? Expectations are so-o-o-o passe."

'Taking guard' 'The pessimist'

Gonna Suck

"Sometimes, on days like this, I feel like the world is conspiring to make me happy."

Y2K Solutions Inc.

'Turned out nice again.'

This will be a banner day for you!

"The scariest part is knowing that someday something'll come along that will make us go, 'Even the spider mutants weren't this bad.' "

"If at first you don't succeed blame somebody."

'You know, that Lenny is a real 'glass half empty' kind of guy...!'

'I'm afraid things have to get worse before they can get even worse.'

'Against Joie De Vivre': Meet the author today.

"Is this worse? Or is this worse?"

All my silver linings have clouds around them.

DOOM, 'I do love you, Arnie, but you're such a downer!'

"This feels like the start of something that will eventually break one of our hearts."

"Oh what a beautiful morning!"

'Do we have to go through this every year Henman says he can win Wimbledon?'