Pessimism Lover Gifts

The split end is near.

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

'My pessimism keeps me optimistic.'

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Pessimists v Optimists.

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

'There, Mr Optimist. Now how full is it?'

"If, indeed, there is a reason for all this, than that's so much worse."

Doom & Gloom

Tom's last day.

'I make certain all my clients are pessimists...they don't expect to win.'

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

The End is Near art gallery opening.

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

"Maybe you should be depressed, your life isn't that great."

'Barnhill from Marketing will present our economic projections.'

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

'Some see the glass as half empty, some see it as half full -- I see it as taxable!'

"Die alone"

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

'Taking guard' 'The pessimist'

'Would you say this glass is half empty or half full?'

Gonna Suck

"Sometimes, on days like this, I feel like the world is conspiring to make me happy."

'Turned out nice again.'

Y2K Solutions Inc.

This will be a banner day for you!

"If at first you don't succeed blame somebody."

'You know, that Lenny is a real 'glass half empty' kind of guy...!'

Things are never as bad as they seem - they're usually much, much worse.

'I'm afraid things have to get worse before they can get even worse.'

DOOM, 'I do love you, Arnie, but you're such a downer!'

All my silver linings have clouds around them.