Perk Ponderers Gifts

The company vehicle

"It's not like I'm doing away with your health benefits. I'm just asking YOU to pay for it."

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

'The economy being what it is, we've had to make a few changes in your retirement plan. . .'

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

"What if Newton came up with a different idea from a fallen apple."

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

"If we take a late retirement and an early death, we'll just squeak by."

"I just learned that my golden parachute was not properly packed."

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

'There must be some way we can capitalize on that damn boson.'

"The industry has agreed to take the pensions dashboard off our hands. . ."

How do you fell about buying your own health insurance?

'When bad 401ks happen to good people'

Passing the Pension Time Bomb

"The pension crisis prompted me to consider alternative invstments. Like Roulette."

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

"I'm the ghost of your future retirement."

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

Retirement Issues

"What's so galling is that you don't even realize how Earthist you are."

Never mind spring. What do you predict for the economy?

"The real trick will be enjoying retirement long enough before the Government goes belly up."

'No, I'm not into astronomy. That telescope is for you to see your new parking spot.'

'I re-invested what was left of my 401K into returnable pop cans. I figure by the time I retire I should have about three dollars.'

The Loneliness of Power

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

"My inner child just turned 62. Where's his money?"

The mysterious world of ligand substitution

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'