Perfectionist Critic Gifts

No One Is Ever Good Enough For Mr. Persnickety

"I’ve seen better metaphors in my litter box."

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

"By God, for a minute there it suddenly all made sense!"

'Even in the mundane tasks, aim for perfection!'

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

'Why am I not surprised that this section is always the most disorganized?'

Lessons from the Blakely Art School (Now Defunct)

Perfection

Poetry repairman

Writer

"Wallace couldn't come, but I brought some of his fussy prose."

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

"You're welcome."

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

"This is Heaven, you idiot. Everything's perfect. There is no suggestion box."

"Take away his brilliant prose, and he's just some depressed guy."

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

Wanting his picnic with Gwen to be perfect, Hal made sure they would not be bothered by ants.

Woman trying to straighten a picture of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

Writers Block: "Day 24 and still no typewriter!"

"And on the eighth day, the Lord just puttered around..." "That cloud doesn't belong there. Did I do that? I'd better move it..."

"There are two kinds of students: perfectionists and procrastinators."

"Come on, we're late. Your crosshatching looks fine."

Quality Control

Hecklers On Poetry Night

"It's no use. We just can't improve on perfection."

"Our standards are so high we only hire people who do crossword puzzles in ink."

Sculptor's Attempts At Sculpting Crumpled Paper Ball End Up In Trash

Abstract Art

"Right foot, left foot, inhale, exhale, right foot..."

"The Graphene making process is working perfectly."

'Regardless, our trip to the Upper Amazon was fine. You know David--everything has to be perfect.'