Peaceful Driver Gifts

'We can exchange information, or, if you prefer, I can punch you in the face and forget the whole thing ever happened.'

My other car has a bumper sticker that says this on it too.

Stop, Smell Roses (stop and smell the roses)

Turmoil change.

'It's the boss! Everyone look mellow!'

Say speed

Construction zone ends. Please resume following your bliss.

"Now remember, after this anointing you need to return every 3 months or 3000 miles."

Driving home for Christmas.

'We'd like to visit a peaceful police state away from any terror treats.'

"How about a self-inflating-a-flat-tire car?"

Traffic Sign Haiku

"I'm in the 56-year intensive program, all meals included."

Roadwork ahead: Proceed cautiously and from love rather than negativity.

'Woo-hoo!!' - Lemmings doing it with style.

Height barrier accident.

'Okay. Where's the fire?'

"There's no charge—the grinding sound you hear when you're driving is coming from your wife's teeth."

I brake for elves.

"I coulda been killed had this not deployed. Thank god for my passenger's side handbag!

'I pulled you over because you were driving suspiciously.'

Drink Driving

'Better slow it down a bit.'

Vicar with cross-shaped car aerial.

Let Go and Let God

"There are no targets, dear. You've been dying too many drones today."

'I'm afraid, Vicar, that you have 'left undone those things which you should have done'!'

"I had you doing six in a five."

"Got any I.D.?"

"Let's jump in the car and drive around aimlessly at half the speed limit."

Radial Reflex: When your steel belted tires hit a speed bump.

GM recall