Paternity Reveal Pillows

Father reveal party

Snow White and the 7 Dwarfs on the Maury show: "I have the DNA results right here!"

"His first out-of-body experience."

"I only travelled with my umbilical cord!"

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

A little bird told me...

Next gen pregnancy tests.

I'm accused of kicking you in the womb, but your evidence is purely circumstantial. Lawyer baby.

'It's a boy. He's healthy and coming along fine, but he may be a little crnkt at birth owing to his claustrophobia. He will have feminine tendencies but is not actually gay. In fact, he'll eventually develop a taste for hard liquor and trashy women...'

"It's a boy, but that's a common one so don't get too excited."

'I demand a DNA test.'

The Complete Book of Baby Names. Oooh, what do you think of 110101110110? Isn't that cute?

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

"Congratulations. The ultrasound shows the baby is healthy, a boy and already knows more about technology than you."

New arrival

'I felt it put it's little boot in then!'

"You might want to start bringing more carrots home, dear. I think I have an ingrown hare."

"My wife tells me the bee has struck again!"

'I'm afraid this doubles your bill.'

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

Smartphone Sonogram

'Trust me, the term 'blissfully pregnant' is an oxymoron.'

"Pregnant!... How did that happen? We took precautions, like not having sex!"

"Congratulations, Mr and Mrs Starmer. It's a tool!"

Baby name suggestions.

'Mom says she has a souffl

Uterus: One size fits all.

"Hurray! I just got born!"

"It's not often you see a sign that is both instructional and inspirational."

"Mother and baby are doing well...Both are in a stable condition."

'Yes, technology has come a long way, but the baby won't have a touch screen.'

"I had no idea life could be so complicated."

'This is a rarity in today's world. No corporate sponsorship signs in here.'

"How unprofessional. There's no brochure on the services and facilities I can expect in here."