Family Reveal Pillows

Harold's suspicions are finally confirmed - 'Son, you're adopted!'

'There's something I never told you about your father, Billy. He was a lawyer.'

"...then click 'save settings', scroll down to 'done' and voila! You're on Facebook stalking Miriam's daughter's new husband."

Base camp for Ed and Janet Wilson's courageous attempt to scale Mt. Blended Family.

'It's time you knew, Son -- you were abandoned here as a child by aliens.'

'Ah ah! That's what I thought! The DNA tests prove that he is in fact a Cuckoo chick...'

'...I really wish you would of told me you wanted to be a ballerina before we got married.'

"Tell me again why we couldn't get an Easter bunny."

"I could never please my father. Whenever I did something he didn't approve of, he'd threaten to go public."

"I'm sorry but, legally, there is no way you can get divorces from your parents."

I was in a menage a trois...until she ran off with our marriage guide counsellor!

"Son, the reason you're not happy like me is because your real father was an oyster.'

"Cherish this moment, because clearly our parents are getting a divorce."

Father reveal party

"You treat this house like a hotel!"

'Now you're older, we think it's time you knew that both your father and I and you are adopted.'

Mom - There's Nothing To Do.

"It's a Bermudez New Year's tradition! While adults reflect peacefully on the previous 12 months...the children clean the entire house."

"Oh, I forgot to tell you: I was adopted."

'It's so nice to finally meet you. we can play 'good mother-in-law - bad mother-in-law'.'

"And this was the man I thought was your father until E-Z Pass records proved that he was in New Jersey when you were conceived."

"Let's surprise Mom with ANOTHER Christmas tree!"

'We really need to learn more about our daughter's dancing classes.'

"My uncle's got a wooden leg..."

'It's okay if you don't hug me, dad.'

"I grew up in a traditional family. My parents divorced when I was six years old."

'He's got his shoes on the wrong feet again.'

"Tio Henry has been going out with Juanita for some time, huh?"

Oldest sibling is last to know about Dad's new girlfriend.

"Uh, thanks for fixing 'ants on a log', Grandma, but I think you're s'pose to put raisins in the peanut butter, not real ants!"

'I've made a terrible mistake, Brian - The girls at work said he was great in bed, but he's just as useless as you!'

"I forgot. My brother Woolard is coming by."