Party Guru T-Shirts

"Do you think you could give me a hand? The guests will be here any minute."

'We annoy them, but no one can say we bore them.'

Come dine with me!

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

Party Animals.

"I just realized you're my entire entourage."

"Anna - there's someone I'd like to meet."

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

Canape?

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

Green Balloon

"Fred's had too much to drink - now he's hitting on that old coat rack."

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

"I am so attracted to you right now."

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

Man at penthouse party walks out onto terrace and is startled to see the Earth, instead of the moon, shining in the sky.

The Streets - Night

A man looks up at the earth

"See that stain? My wife did that, not me. All her, totally her fault."

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

"Send ME to bed early, will they?"

Masquerade

Bar: Now serving 24 hours - 'I want to get as wasted as you look.'

Carioca

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

"Over here, Carol! I've found one with a caramel center!"

Redhead

The Happiest Hen in Acle

'Is this a party, a cheese and wine do, a cocktail party, a soiree or just another of your old cronies get-togethers?'