Park Maintenance Worker Gifts

"Ooooohhhh, that feels so good. Now, down and a little to the right, please."

Bitchbark Canoe

'What the... MOM! This isn't deer! It's a yucky tourist again!!'

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

"Let's hear some of that scout master wisdom now, sir!"

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

"He loves his leaf blower."

"I do miss trees but I don't miss the raking."

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

Dog tries to obey No Dog sign

'Someone's got to do something about these pot-holes!'

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

Garden pond: mosquito breeding ground

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

Hiking sign - Stop, pause, play, skip forward, skip back

The Canoga Forest - coming soon: The Conoga Desert.

'We're a protected species and an endangered speices, but when I see a person, I don't know if he's protecting us or endangering us.'

Even for a mountain goat he's good.

Not much money, glory, or praise

'Surely they don't expect us to carry around THAT sort of money?'

Danger Falling Leaves

Malfunctioning geyser

'Well, that's fixed that.'

"Greta, look! The first dysfunctional family of winter!"

'Hmm ... wonder how much ivory fetches these days.'

'Any chance of a ploughman's?'

'Break glass in case of tangled antlers.'

Clearing the castle's moat.

'Every time we clear all the snow another blizzard hits. We're cursed men Frank. Cursed!'

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

"Is it me, or are these potholes getting worse?"