Park Manager Gifts

Health & Safety Official Tester.

A hiker in the wilderness encounters a suggestion box.

(Do not step on or in any other way offend the grass)

Sign, Keep off.

"Hot sun, metal slide . . . not a good combination!"

Bitchbark Canoe

'What the... MOM! This isn't deer! It's a yucky tourist again!!'

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

"Let's hear some of that scout master wisdom now, sir!"

"I do miss trees but I don't miss the raking."

Dog tries to obey No Dog sign

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

Garden pond: mosquito breeding ground

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

Hiking sign - Stop, pause, play, skip forward, skip back

Even for a mountain goat he's good.

The Canoga Forest - coming soon: The Conoga Desert.

'We're a protected species and an endangered speices, but when I see a person, I don't know if he's protecting us or endangering us.'

'Surely they don't expect us to carry around THAT sort of money?'

Danger Falling Leaves

Malfunctioning geyser

'Hmm ... wonder how much ivory fetches these days.'

'Break glass in case of tangled antlers.'

"Greta, look! The first dysfunctional family of winter!"

'That's right - a restraining order. You should know mother bears are very protective of their young.'

'Some idiot's pulled the plug out!'

'Click it or ticket.'

Snorkeling: A Dollar A Minute

"He ran out of pee."

Rain Forest

"Perhaps I should have warned you...They really don't like wholemeal bread."

"True, it is 'organic.' It's also a dead squirrel!"

Wolf Reintroduction.