Park Critic Gifts

Who's really behind all one-star national parks reviews.

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

'Hey, want to go to the beach ...I mean ...the birdbath?'

Preliminary Price Tag: $5,000,000,000

"Are we done yet? ... Because I'm turning around now."

SF NO

"We'll always hate Paris."

"I could have gotten to the top . . . but I wasted all my time in the park."

"You know it's peak allergy season when they welcome Mom back into the flock."

'I see the rebranded mobile methadone project got underway.'

"'Article I. Section 9. Claus B. No title of nobility shall be granted by the United States' - we gotta change that."

"These are wonderful, precious years before he learns that he's benefitting from institutional racism."

Oligarchy

'It's the council's flood defence system.'

Man Sitting On Park Bench Feeding Batteries To Drones.

Hugo Chavez - A peace loving man.

"We're spending too much time fetching balls in the park."

Gardener pulling a tree through a dog park with a dog marking his territory.

"Don't worry they will find us. We're still in the park..."

'Corporations' studying a city for its 'pros' and 'cons'

Life's a bench.

'Please tell me you made reservations.'

Focus Groupies

"I don't like it already."

'Nevermore.' (quote the raven, feeding pigeons)

'I hate bird watching in the city.'

"If anyone needs me, I'm on my biscotti break in Bryant Park, ogling the shirtless losers."

"Why do we lose our leaves in the fall - I'm cold all winter."

Gentrification vs Manchester...

Our occupations? I am a student of The Contemporary Scene and my friend, here is an observer of The Passing Parade.

"I found a really good parking place, dear, so I'm going to spend the weekend downtown shopping. . ."

Your Sculpture while you wait.

Men Working Since 1931

"Sometimes, on a clear day, you can actually see a tree..!"