Playground Critic Gifts

"Mistakes were made…lessons will be learnt. The council now accepts it was a mistake to use quicksand in the play area."

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

"Remember when playgrounds were fun?"

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

'You see, Brad, I'm not just a highly polished career woman.'

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

he tries to fly all the time but actually never gets airborne

"I'm bored."

Dog helps girl jumprope with wagging tail affixed to rope.

"So, what do you do for play?"

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

'Maybe the batteries are dead.'

A child sitting on a swing - while playing with a hand-held electronic device or phone

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

"Recess does things to a man."

'I prefer the term 'whistleblower' to tattletale.'

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

'Red rover, red rover, send Billy right over!'

'Don't let them know you're a prodigy. If they find out, they'll take away your teddy bear.'

Anderson Cooper as a Kid. Today, an expose that asks the question: Who IS Simon, and why must we do what he says?

'Ready Mum?'

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"He's only energetic on sunny days."

'Play post office? -- I don't like violent games.'

"Have your parents sign this waiver concerning violations of personal space. . . then you guys can play tag."

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

'Wow! School's only been out for ten minutes, and I've already forgotten everything I learned.'

"It turns out I just wasted the whole morning networking with a dog."

"Ok, so I go back and forth… Then what?"

Office Park

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

Converted Parking Garage

'They're relics of the many ancient civilization that have dwelled at Blisshaven.'