Parental Guidance Follower Gifts

"My Mother was right. She told me when I was eighteen, that if I married him it wouldnt last!"

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

"...and I, Pastor Smith...preaching to you now from this pulpit, speak to you from experience about the 'strong-willed' child...BELIEVE me!"

Father

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

"Be afraid to try new things!"

'If you are not careful, son, you will be mathematically eliminated from all of the Ivy League schools.'

Dummies for Dummies.

'I'm going to bed...whatever...'

Exam Room.

Ask your mother computer.

"Better safe than sorry, son."

"Your inability to turn off your critical voice, combined with your fear of disappointing your overbearing, demanding father, is causing you to lose faith in your fastball."

'Obviously, the school board is giving an unfair advantage to gifted students.'

'My mother made me apply.'

"Hahahaha! Oh, you are hilarious! Help you with your math homework … hahahaha!"

'Soon he will stop asking where he came from and start telling you where he is going.'

Before birds and bees,

"This is humiliating. Couldn't you drop me a block from school?"

'I remember when she was proud to be seen with her parents.'

"Okay...seriously...it's nothing to worry about, Dad."

'No, the Patriot Act doesn't make it all right for you to read your sister's diary!'

'How many times have I told you to stop playing with that calculator?'

"My day? Don't even get me started!"

"The thing is, I've grown and you haven't."

"Ten more minutes of media manipulation, then it's off to bed."

Cinema Certification, Suitable for kids, but will drive parents to distraction.

"Dad, remember how you bungled the Lorton account?"

Wayside Elementary School - Now Available: Curbside Pickup!

'Why can't you try to be more like me?'

High expectations