Parent With Family Dog Gifts

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

Things to do: 1. Sit 2. Stay 3. Sit 4. Stay

A large leaf falling on a dog

'Super Dog'

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

"Don't even think about it."

Unbeknownst to most, dogs are actually greedy bastards searching for gold,

'Surely they don't expect us to carry around THAT sort of money?'

But it's the other leg that hurts.

"Thank goodness for pet doors because the alarm on my piddle clock was about to ring on the rug."

'It says here: while most dogs are family dogs, some dogs like one family member more. Do you think Fritzi is like that?'

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

Lost my squeaky toy. Please help.

Dog History

"I just don't get it, they don't do it themselves, so why do they insist on us sitting before crossing the road?"

"If you don't make up your mind who's taking me out, I'll do it right here."

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

"Have you consider the possibility that I don't want the paper?"

'We don't do tricks.. because then they'll begin to expect it.'

'Well, it's kind of an IV enema!'

'Come to think of it son, there's not a single spot in this backyard I've not dug out sometime...'

"I can never remember, how much do we tip?"

"Fetch! What about a please?"

'Vet clinic? I'd like to make an appointment for a physical. It's been seven years.'

'...Basset Hound! Anal sacs!'

Homemade dog biscuits.

"Must we discuss your worming right before dinner?"

"Some puppies get bored when they're alone, but my family left me enough chew toys to last all day."

'It's a nine-to-five job, but most of it we spend napping.'

Autumn Dog

Dog on leash not able to reach tree

"So far, I've taught him to fetch."

"That's impressive, but I asked you to roll over."

"Come on, just try it."

"Very Funny."