Parent Scout Gifts

'Mom's really nervous because I've been good for too long.'

"Be afraid to try new things!"

'Eddy! Can you check that recall list on the toy website again to see if this swing is included?'

'I wasn't playing hooky -- I was fleeing the deteriorating public school system.'

'I'm going to bed...whatever...'

"It's all significantly less impressive once you realize these guys had free child care."

'I see the SAGA talent scouts are here.'

"Other than being sent to the principal's office, my detention, and three day suspension, school was good."

"Better safe than sorry, son."

'Obviously, the school board is giving an unfair advantage to gifted students.'

"Your dad sure worries a lot."

"Your inability to turn off your critical voice, combined with your fear of disappointing your overbearing, demanding father, is causing you to lose faith in your fastball."

'My mom just explained babies to me. I'm not sure, but I think I'm a bird and you're a bee.'

"Give my kid a passing grade and you could be looking at many more nice apples."

"Go join your coach and the rest of your team. I'll be watching from the bar."

'Wow! Feel that kick! I'm buying him a football for his first birthday!'

Little League Registration: "Um, I think we're gonna need to see your birth certificate again, son. . ."

'I forgot to bring diapers. We were a long way from refreshing.'

'How many times have I told you to stop playing with that calculator?'

"Of course, you've always set a good example for me ... that's why you embarrass me so much."

"And I suppose if your friends all jumped off a cliff you'd follow right along?"

"Would you explain to your son that there's no free agency in T-ball?"

"So your soccer team lost...big deal! I lose things all the time!"

Cinema Certification, Suitable for kids, but will drive parents to distraction.

'Mummy said let it drop,there's a good boy..'

'Why can't you try to be more like me?'

"We started him signing at 6 months."