Parent Coach Gifts

"Would you explain to your son that there's no free agency in T-ball?"

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"That's not how I sat on you."

"My kid's a holy terror... no offense."

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

The best PE teacher in the World.

"Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed, so you'll have to bring yourselves up."

My 5-year-old nephew cut his hair! His mom was so upset until she thought: 'Wait a minute! I just saved 12 bucks!'

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

'I'm not spoiled - I always smell like this.'

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

"Mom, can you come get me?"

'Still having problems finding a baby sitter?'

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

"Some day you'll look back at this and remember me as the person who taught you to fear water."

Parenting Business Deals

"I told my mom either the sitter goes, or I go!"

"We're going to have to think outside the box to boost sales, minion."

'The only thing exciting about these games is our dads fighting with the umpire.'

'But, Mom, being good just doesn't work for me.'

Mother pushes twins on a double-decker swing.

'The best way to teach my son is by example, you know: Monkey see, monkey do...'

The First Day Back

"Leapfrog is the latest craze among the kids, but experts say it contribute to declining birthrates. Find out why � after the break!"

"All this time I've been trying to get her to walk, and all it took was a phone."