Parent Prankster Pillows

'No, but at least now he matches the curtains.'

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

'Hey, I think my parents fooled me. This game is called 'Algebra Hero'.'

"No! I am your father!" "Noooooo!"

'We're playing trampoline, mom.'

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

"Guess who figured how to call 911!"

"Congratulations, Mr and Mrs Starmer. It's a tool!"

"I'm hoping for a pardon from the Governor."

"I'm too old for a baby-sitter. How about hanging a portrait with the eyes that always seem to look at you?"

'This not exactly what I had in mind when I told him about the birds and the bees.'

It is always something whenever Grandmother watches little Louis.

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

"Well, Billy; according to your dog's x-ray, he didn't eat your homework!"

Darling, you should have asked me to put sun tan lotion on your back and not the kids!

'Okay...now watch what happens when I extend my claws.'

"Who would've thought Ms. Marcus had so little sense of humor?"

'I'm not looking for treasure. I'm trying to find where I buried Dad.'

I will not chew gum in class, even sugarless....

'Daddy! Are you using the number forty clipper?'

"We should get a lot of money from the tooth fairy. I set out grandpa's false teeth!"

'You did that on purpose!'

'Last year my kids put a sign on my back, but tomorrow, on April Fools Day, I'll be ready, they won't get me again.'

'I've only just learned to read, and I'm already on page twelve of my sister's diary.'

Yes, we have a 'Happy Meal'. It's when you leave the kids home.

'If you find any loose ones, I have dibs on them for the tooth fairy.'

"Doing chores is very stimulating. I'm always thinking of ways to avoid them."

'Today, dad has cooked and we're well prepared!'

Ask me about Naming Rights.

'I fixed the dent in the bumper.'