Parent Of The Year Pillows

"I'm married with five children." "Sorry, we're looking for someone with sound judgement!"

'We need to start working more closely to try to improve these grades. Do you have my office number?'

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Cry babies.

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

Impressing dad.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

Children's artwork exhibition.

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

"Mother, I think I'm good enough to exhibit on the living room walls now."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

Babies vs. Dogs

'Well, he's definitely got your nose...'

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"I miss the Augean stables."

'Wow! Your kid looks a lot like you!'

Mother feeds messy child with extra long spoon.

'She posted her first blog today.'

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"We're so proud. Only 5 months old and already knows how to scroll and swipe."

'Dear, Junior ate his first house today!'

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

'It is a big day! Ten years ago, yout dad joined the union!'

"We're going to the park to size up the competition."

"Little Lucas doesn't go anywhere without his weighted blanket."