Father Of The Year Pillows

"I miss the Augean stables."

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

Young golf ball getting "the talk".

'You never met my father? Never mind, I'm turning into him!'

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

Skateboard

'Dad, can I borrow the club tonight?'

'Just wait until I'm introduced to carbonated beverages!'

'It Kicked!' - 'Punt, Drop or Tad?'

Man building a tree house

"Stay-at-home Snowdad."

'Good one Dad. Imagine your catch if you had bought us REAl fishing gear.'

"It's different when they're your own."

'Let daddy know if you get a bite.'

"Just be proud we're the first father-son ice dancing team."

"I couldn't find the off switch."

'My kid is going to Harvard, and Jim's son to Stanford- which college accepted yoyr kid, Fred? ( pix of clown on desk)

'Don't take it too hard, Dad, Mr. Hodes down the street is just having a great year.'

Travelling with child sketchbook - finale

"...No, he can't really fly...no, the bad guys really don't have a ray gun...no, this cereal really isn't the best food in the whole world...no, it won't make you as strong as a giant..."

'No kid, I don't remember your mother! Christ, I've impregnated DOZENS of test-tubes!'

'Let's hit the road, son! We are Baby Bjorn to be wild!'

'Well, nurse, it was a bit daft putting me next to this mirror!'

"Actually, he's developing at an absolutely normal rate for his age..!"

'It's a tough world, son. You inflate. You get kicked around all your life. Then one day - bam! You deflate.'

As a boy, Isaac Newton ignored his father's advice to persevere, preferring instead to let things drop.

'We need to start working more closely to try to improve these grades. Do you have my office number?'

"Shhh, Daddy's painting – snack time can wait."

"Everyone wants to know what Jesus would do. No one ever asks how Jesus is feeling about his complicated relationship with his father."

Dads.

'Yuk! Whose idea was it to let Dad choose the entertainment for his birthday?'

"I don't know why I couldn't have had a peanut butter and jelly taco!"

Be patient, son. I started with Pluto and worked my way up, too.

"Mommie!"

'And the coolest dad of the year award goes to... Dr. Armstrong for his note, 'to whom it may concern, my son is allergic to homework'.'